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(About) Time to Make the Donuts – Dunkin Donuts Hits Vienna

The calories bombs have arrived and Viennese are willing to stand in line for one of these rainbow colored sugar fat bombs.

So they’re not healthy.

They don’t claim to be. And Dunkin Donuts doesn’t even try to pretend they are. In fact, they even post the nutritional facts on their website in an easy-to-download PDF. But let’s face it, no one runs to the donut shop for a serving of grapefruit with a stick of celery on the side. No, you go because you’re craving sugar, fat and something more.

And what’s the more?

Happy Dunkin Donut Employee

Happy Dunkin Donut Worker

You want to be propelled back to a time when food wasn’t about nutrition, vitamins, proteins and blah blah blah. No, you want to revisit for a pleasant little hour, the days when you chose what you consumed based on the fun factor — blinding neon green lollipops, Lightning Lemonade Bubbalicious and candy made by a chemist who melted ingredients into a syrup and then exposed them to pressurized carbon dioxide gas (600 pounds per square inch (!)) just so you could have the ultimate sensation of Pop Rocks exploding in your mouth and staining your tongue and teeth with toxic shades of red and blue.

Sadly, not even Eric’s homemade brewskis, though ice cold and great with poker, smile back at you when you reach for one.

Dunkin Donut Queue

Queue in front of DD on Mariahilferstrasse in Vienna on a Friday afternoon

But Mrs. Happy International doughnut will. And who can resist smiling back at a bunch of doughnuts grinning from doughnut-edge to doughnut edge. Especially if only the MRS. made it into the shop shelves of Mariahilf though her hubby is featured in the glossy brochure.

Dunkin Donuts menu

More than just donuts – pastrami, wraps and BAGELS!

For Austrians venturing to Dunkin Donuts for the first time – here’s some tips: Yes, Americans do like the flavored coffees – be bold and give ‘em a try, bagels are not to be missed and if you get them to go, take them home and toast them and then slather on some Philadelphia crème cheese purchased at your local Billa or fry up some chives, smoked salmon and eggs and bite into a taste of the Big Apple.

And if you are trying to brownie up at the office, pick up a dozen or two of these glazed temptations to go and then – just because you’re such a great guy (or gal) — drop them on a plate in the staff kitchen, send the “Office All” (even-the-guy-who-sits-next-to-the-copier-who-no-one-knows-his-name) email with the Betreff: “Donuts — Come and Get ‘em While they last.” Then stand back and spectate as your co-workers wrestle till the last (wo)man is triumphantly standing with Boston Crème in hand. (And be sure to put one aside for copy man – you want to be sure he’ll keep helping you unjam the papers you print).

Donuts in every color of the rainbow

Donuts in every color of the rainbow

For Americans living in Austria – Austrians are like Bilbao Baggins – when you have a birthday, you bring a treat for your co-workers not vice versa so see previous paragraph. With Dunkin Donuts in town, you will never again suffer a birthday morning brain freeze at the local U-Bahn Anker trying to determine if your co-workers would prefer the Kaisergugelhupf or the Topfenkuchen. And the big bonus: THEY ARE OPEN SUNDAYS!

And for Viennese policeman – your American counterparts might like to snag a free donut and coffee by hanging out at the local Dunkin Donuts but – alas – I fear the shop here in Vienna has barely enough seating to accommodate Paris Hilton with her Chihuahua in tow, let alone the city’s defenders of peace and justice.

And anyone who would like to indulge themselves in the total Dunkin Donut experience, just gotta get to know Fred – the “Gotta-Make-the-Donuts” guy. Sometimes a bit creepy, always lovable and a true blue American icon:

 

Vienna Dunkin Donuts Website: http://dunkin.at/

Anxious Donut fans

Anxious donut fans wait in line at Dunkin Donuts shop on Mariahilferstrasse

Print This Post Two Dunkin Donuts Vienna Locations:

1) Mariahilfer Strasse 95, 1060 Vienna

(end nearest Westbahnhof – U3 Subway Station Zieglergasse)

Monday – Friday: 7 am – 8 pm

Saturdays: 9 am – 9 pm

Sundays: 9 am – 6 pm

2) Meidlinger Hauptstrasse 55, 1120 Vienna

(U4 Subway Meidling Hauptstrasse)

Monday – Friday: 7 am – 8 pm

Dunkin Donuts flavored coffees

Dunkin Donuts flavored coffees

Saturdays: 9 am – 9 pm

Sundays: 9 am – 6 pm

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Krapfen – Getting Fat in Honor of Fat Tuesday

FASCHINGSKRAPFEN / FAT TUESDAY APRICOT JAM FILLED DONUTS

“The Viennese can depend on us (for high quality Krapfen]” – MA 59 – the Vienna magistrate guys patrolling for Krapfen capers

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Aida Krapfen

Aida Krapfen

Austrians take their Fasching Krapfen quite seriously. Currently the Viennese MA 59 is patrolling the Krapfen at the local markets as you read to make absolutely certain that Krapfen vendors adhere to strict Viennese standards and sell only Krapfen filled with apricot jam, which must make up at least 15% of the total Krapfen (no skimping Omi!)  and per kg of flour,  at least 6 egg yolks (get laying chickens) – you go get those Krapfen criminals, Vienna!

The consumer protection city council woman has been quoted in a press release saying, “The Viennese can depend on us [to ensure quality Krapfen].”

Don’t know about all of you, but I’ll sleep much better tonight, thanks to the grossly underappreciated MA 59.

Krapfen with apricot filling (at least 15%!)

Krapfen with apricot filling (at least 15%!)

I am sure somewhere along the line you’ve heard a tale about these baked goods.  Most likely the one concerning John F. Kennedy’s June 26, 1963 speech in front of the Berlin Schöneberg city hall when he declared ‘Today, in the free world, the proudest sentence is, “Ich bin ein Berliner”’ and how due to an errant indefinite article — an “ein/a” — he declared to the Germans and the rest of the free world that the President of the United States would not just stand by their side in times of hardship but that he was, in fact, a jelly doughnut.

Yeap. Jelly doughnuts. Gotta watch them. Especially this time of year shortly before Lent and around Fasching/Karneval/Fat Tuesday/Mardi Gras.

Like right now in Austria. When to celebrate Fasching, Austrians will be consuming ungodly amounts of the yeast dough jam filled calorie bombs.

Faschingskrapfen from (gasp!) Billa

Faschingskrapfen from (gasp!) Billa

I don’t believe the word “Fasching” translates into “The-weeks-before-Lent-when-you-put-on-the-pounds,” but maybe it should. Whoever called the day “Fat Tuesday” wasn’t far off the mark.

Aida Krapfen Poster

Aida Krapfen Poster

History of the Krapfen
Legend has it that the imperial cook, Cäcilie Krapfen, who people — no doubt lovingly — referred to as Frau Cilly (written with an “C” not an “S”, mind you) started the Viennese Krapfen tradition as we know it today.  That being said, Krapfen are no new kids on the block. References to them have been supposedly found in documents as old as 1486. Apparently as far back as ancient Rome, no toga party was complete without the jelly-filled dough bombs.

So where does the “Cilli-ness” come in?

Apparently Frau Cilly served up her Cilly Balls on the Viennese balls and in 1815, the year of the Vienna Congress, 10 million Cilly balls “Cillykugeln” were served at the various diplomatic events and festivities. In a famous literary work of the early 1800s, the satirical “Eipeldauer Letters“, which are fictive letters about a journey to Vienna during Fasching, the writer of the letters observes,  “And just in case I wanted to forget that we are still in the jolly Fasching season, the Krapfen would remind me once again. “Wenn ich’s aber auch vergessen wollt’, daß wir noch im lustigen Fasching sind, so würden mich schon d’Krapfen dran erinnern.”

Actually, now that I think about it, things could have been worse for Pres. Kennedy. He could have made his speech in Vienna and declared, “Ich bin ein Wiener” which would be either a Viennese veal cutlet or a Viennese hotdog. Jelly donuts seem far more preferable.

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Fancy Schmancy Aida Krapfen

Fancy Schmancy Aida Krapfen

READ MORE:

Wager, Christoph, Ich Koche Website, http://www.ichkoche.at/geschichte-des-krapfen-artikel-406,  accessed February 2014 (language, German).

Site (in German) with Photo instructions and recipe (scroll down to 23.01.2006, 21:03 entry) for making your very own Krapfen (gotta love it and your loved ones will definitely love you) http://www.sagen.at/forum/showthread.php?t=464 accessed February 2014, (language, German).

Read the MA 59 press release here: http://www.ots.at/presseaussendung/OTS_20140218_OTS0068/fasching-wiener-marktamt-kontrolliert-krapfen.

Here the Vienna city government website with contact info for the media and for all of you if you come across any Krapfen offenders: http://www.wien.gv.at/rk/msg/2014/02/18006.html

Krone Tips for delicious Krapfen (in German) Krone article on How Much You Have to Run to Work off a Krapfen

Presse tells you where to find your Krapfen: http://diepresse.com/home/leben/ausgehen/1563220/Krapfen – they recommend the following three places:
1 Konditorei Jindrak, Herrenstraße 22–24, 4020 Linz (in Linz?!) The Upper Austrians do like to say, “In Linz, beginnt’s” (Maybe the Presse author is Upper Austrian and therefore bias)
2. Café & Konditorei Groissböck, Zentrale Neilreichgasse 96-98, 1100 Vienna, Mon to Sat, 7.30 am –7 pm, Sun and holidays, 8 am – 7 pm
3 Kurkonditorei Oberlaa, u. a. Neuer Markt 16, 1010 Vienna, daily 8 am till 8 pm
I am certainly no MA 59 by any means but Billa, Anker and Aida seem to have pretty good Krapfen too.  May the Krapfen gods foregive my unknowing American taste buds if this statement be considered sacrilege for Krapfen connoisseurs.

 

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